I want to run

Maybe I should change my name and run...so I don't have to hold on. A great line from an even better song. Sums me up in a few words. I never really imagined that the entirety of a human soul could be scooped up and held in just a handful of words but they do. Well then, I guess we should let them lay as they will. When it is time for the rubber to meet the road, we realize we are not as special as we thought we were. You grow up having these delusional images of self perception that make you think you are unique, that you'll make a difference, that somehow your mere existence, your breathing on this earth will cause a shift in the winds. And then we are confronted head on with the truth of it all and we are forced to reconcile our hopes and dreams with the reality that life around us moves on just fine whether or not we take part in its wheels.

And the truth is sad, it's scary. What the hell are we doing this all for. Every day. For what. That question brings answers that might be terrifying, sad at best. We spend our whole life working for people to know us, to love us, to appreciate us. To know us. But do we even know who the hell we even are. Do we even know what the hell we want others to see. We spend our whole life creating 'me'. Do we really want others to see the real 'me' or just the 'me' we want to broadcast, the 'me' we are comfortable putting out there. Do we want others to touch our scars, to see what we see in the mirror, to see the tracks of the road we've been on.

And then once our mask is removed, will they feel the same. Will they remember all the rainbows after the great big storm.